THOUGHT: How To Be Positive And Happy

All based on my true stories & experiences. (i'm not a healing prof, I just want to share some tips to my readers)

I went under a very depressing state throughout June & July. How depressing? I couldn't think straight, I couldn't focus on what I want, I couldn't express my feelings.

I only work during weekends, and basically I stay at home all the time during weekdays because all my friends were busy working. I had no one to talk to, I felt lifeless, I made everything worse, I hated my family, I hated my friends, I hated my boyfriend. Then, my boyfriend was very patient to help me day by day, and I feel that i am getting better now. Here are some tips!

#TIP 1: take everything as challenge from god
It works really well on me. Whenever I have hard times, I face a lot of bad situations,and I tell myself "hey it's just a challenge from god, he wants to know how well you can handle it by your own, and show him, you can do it". I stayed calm and find solutions to solve every problem. Your life is all in your hand, it may be good and bad, but never let others control you life.

#TIP 2: stop comparing and judging
I know everyone of us compare and judge when we feel dissatisfy. E.g. "omg, she's so ugly and fat, how can she even get a bf", honestly when you start judging, it's actually you getting jealous, don't deny it so quickly, think deeply, are you? When you stop comparing and judging, I bet your life would be much easier everyday.

#TIP 3: give compliments
Yes, compliments help us to boost our mood and confidence. One thing I love about being a promoter, is because I love how sweet people compliment me. I love to have some chit chat and interact section with random aunties or uncles. They all are so sweet, they are straight. If you treat them well, they will treat you well. Some might be fake compliments, but its okay! As long as its a compliment, it helps you to look forward everyday.

#TIP 4: look at the good instead of bad
I know there are sometimes that bad things happen but it isn't permanent, there's something good that happens to us everyday too. We only magnify bad things and ignore the good, and we let ourselves feel depressed and down all the time. Then why not try to think more positively? Like whenever you had a great lunch,or when you help someone, or when you smile to random person, these all are good situations that we choose to ignore. "The stars will only glow in the dark", I hope you understand this quote, as it means to not only see the bright side of things within all the negativity, but also that they are the only things that are enlightening the path that we chose.

#TIP 5: get new friends
I love making new friends, its something special. Even tho I might have some friendship problems and I don't have any true friends. Getting a new friend is a way to let you express yourself the most. You can talk any topic randomly with them, discuss the things you struggle the most, and they will give you some ideas.

#TIP 6: never take "something/someone" too important except yourself.
There's a quote: Love yourself, before you start to love others. Indeed it is true. How can you love others when you don't even love yourself. Treat yourself the best, love yourself the most. I will make examples for this, and this is not specifically for someone. (NO OFFENCE)

e.g: hurt yourself when you hurt by your "one and only love". Hurt as in many ways, punch yourself, starve yourself, or worse, think to die to protest and to show how much you love him/her. These are the stupidest ways ever. And the only way to prove you are good with it,then face it and deal with it, live your life to the best and show them. I know it isn't easy, but hey cmon, 20 years old and you want to die because of your "one and only true love". I know how it feels, I get hurt before, but the thing I always do, is ignore first and think. If you can't, take a nap and let yourself chill. Don't make harsh decisions. You will regret it in the end. Its always better than hurting yourself. Your mom gived birth to you, and you hurt yourself because of an unworthy love story?

#TIP 7: ignore everything you don't wish to happen.
I needed a really long time to learn this. Nowadays, we all only talk thru whatsapp, no sms, no calls. And you know the thing when you whatsapp someone and that person takes forever to reply you. Yeah, you get much OUCH and curse that fucking bloody person who never reply you. WE ALL TAKE WHATSAPP AS LIFE and worse, if ask something in group and nobody gives you a fuck. I get so pissed off. I concluded whoever doesn't get any reply, that person either dont want to talk to you or too busy to reply you. and how to face this problem, ignore it. When you don't get any reply, just chill and ignore, meanwhile, you can get less troubles.

#TIP 8: BE HAPPY.
The easiest and hardest. We care because we all are human, but tell yourself, happy is better than sad. Don't post negative statuses, and nag how bad your life is. (YOU'RE THE ONE WHO CREATE YOUR OWN LIFE). You only look at the bad sides more than the good sides. If your life has no one, go and find someone. If your life is dark, go and fill with colours! Hide aside and cry, and think negatively will never bring you happiness.


I get inspired by my bf and the old man (kiki streling kak incident). The uncle chose to forgive her, and let it go.
So why frown when you can smile?

Be happy and charming, because your smile is the key to happiness.



Love, 
Winnie.

THOUGHT: Shut your mouth up.

I barely will want to speak anything about my relationship and I don't think I have to share anything to every of you. However, I started to have a lot of negative thoughts for months and I can't be happy anymore.  

Maybe because during high school, I gave others bad impressions of me, like bully my bf, angry about him easily, or just do something bad towards him.

Indeed he is good but everyone has flaws, even me and all of you. But why everyone only looks at his good sides and the bad sides of me?

We have been together for 6 years and I really had enough judgement from outsiders who think I am a very bad girlfriend, a girlfriend who merely magnifies problems and cries a river for every shits or expresses it in my own way without thinking his feelings. 

Obviously I am here to clarify and stop judge me from being what kind of girlfriend I am because it's none of your business.

Never I can accept judgement from any of you who do not know me at all, nor our relationship, of course I don't expect you to know us.

Then, shut your fucking mouth up before you split out a word to define me or our relationship. Every relationship only belongs to 2 person and I do not need the 3,4,5 or more to know what's going on between us.

NOW, I am going to tell every of you who think you know about us. As I said I can't accept any judgement and I am here to clarify myself. Its not your turn to define me as what kind of person I am, because I am still a human, if I ever do something wrong, it's normal. (don't you ever tell me you didn't do something wrong).

The thing is I do have bad temper, I don't feel happy if thing goes wrong. I admit because it's my personality but if you think because I have bad temper and I just bully my bf everytime, I can tell you are wrong. I have reason when I angry over something, I will not angry for nothing, whereas Brian is the type of person who will only listens quietly. Perhaps that gives you a wrong illusion to think he is innocent and I am a bad devil. 

If he felt unhappy being with me, he had already left me years ago, instead he chose to stay with me no matter how, then whats wrong with you to think anything bad of our relationship?

My mom once told me, it will be better if one has bad temper to be the "bad person" and another one to keep quiet and be the "good person" in a family. Apparently I am the bad person (The character I am acting right now and everyone judges me) while he is the good person.

What's going on between us is not what you all think it is. Everything happens with reason and I think I do not need to explain it. But I am just hereby to tell you all that PLEASE STOP THINKING I AM A MANIAC GIRLFRIEND WHO ONLY SCOLD/ BLAME BOYFRIEND.

Nobody will ever like to argue, at least arguing let us know each other more and to prove we still care each other.

The main purpose for blogging this is because I can't accept how people only think the bad sides of me and start to judge me, please get it right.

I had enough of being judged by a bunch of people who think they know about us. I just don't fucking care (I wish I can). 

By the way! Thanks for reading.

Love, Winnie.

THOUGHT: Society nowadays

Lately, I've been watching some social experiment videos from DmPranks Production and a video from facebook, talked about people in India who doesn't try to help a guy who is going to die and Click Network posted a video about do singaporeans have a heart? > CLICK HERE 

Every each time I watch these videos, I ask myself, will I help them? will I be the good person? Apparently, it's hard for all Malaysians, I mean not all, but majority. Whenever I see someone selling tissue or foods or anything, I wont buy, because 1) it's not necessary 2) I just don't.

MALAYSIA IS NOT SAFE AT ALL. There are so many scams out there by using different ways to cheat people, kidnap people, etc.

I saw a lot of articles saying, scratch winning card could be a scam, get flyer could be a scam, help people could be a scam also. I mean whatthefuck. Whatever we do, we still could be the next victim. 

That day I went out with my gf, a girl asked my gf if she could borrow her hand phone because the girl lost hers. I'm not sure if the girl really lost her phone or maybe she was a cheater who wanted to steal my gf's phone. REMEMBER WE COULD BE THE NEXT VICTIM.

Then, I read daphne charice's blog,  click to view. She met a road rage, prolly the chinese guy wanted to cheat her money then banged her on purpose. LOOK, we just never know what will happens in the next second.

I'm not a heartless person but I am trying not to get involve and be the next victim.



Love, Winnie.

THOUGHT: Judgy Human

I know it's too random to blog about my thoughts, oh.. maybe just for me cause normally I will only blog about foods and stuffs but barely my thoughts. 

So, yup, today i'm here to talk about judgy human.

I've lived in this world for nearly 20 years, not sure why, but I feel so emotional about what people talk among me. I mean, yeah, I am really sensitive to people who talk about me, but who does not? You dare to tell the world you really wouldn't mind even you said so? If you really wouldn't mind why would you still post it out to let the whole world know that you will not mind? (hope you guys get what i mean actually)

As I grow older, I find the world is getting complicated, darker and full of different faces people. I didn't say I'm excluded cause probably one of you who know me will think that i am weird (as in bad), bad temper or some shits. Hey, cmon, I mean no one is perfect? Everyone has flaw.

I do judge people also, so I can't blame those human who judge me. I will gossip about the people I hate with my friends, I will talk bad about them... like what a normal human always do.

Because we all are human so that we care, but because we are human so that we judge. We judge because we jealous, because we mind, because of anything what people look after you.

So here's my story, I have a twitter account, so I think if anything bad, I feel that i am not satisfy or want to express, twitter will be the only place, i mean its used to be a place for me to talk with no one. At least, I release my anger to let me feel better. Day by day, twitter becomes a place where people talk bad about people and slowly becomes a place to stalk what that person's facing. (do you guys actually know what i say?) 

Alright, make it easy. I still express in twitter like I always do, but some sort of people will judge and make it as a topic. I won't and can't stop what people want to judge me because at least respect what a people want to express when they need a place to breathe. I know maybe some of you would think I am the one who judge also, cause I am human too, but all I wanted to say is just RESPECT.

I do not have a friend to talk with my problems, so I could only hide the feelings with me, if really the only place for me to express is barred, please tell me where else or who else I can just talk with my own feelings?

Are you going to make joke of a people who is going to die? Then why are you making a joke of a people who is depressing? 

There are all feelings, everyone has feelings. But probably people nowadays with gadgets on hand, scroll the facebook, twitter & instagram, talk around with friends because they deserve a laughter.

Please do know the limits, put yourself in shoes, I would say. 

嘴巴是你的，我不能管，但至少尊重别人。

No one will not mind about what people judge about them unless they have no feelings at all.

* If I have offended you, I'm so sorry.

* It's not a specific blog post for someone, just a random thought.
*get right what is the purpose why I blog about this, I just want some respect for those who is depressing and people still make joke of it.

Love, Winnie.

THOUGHT: Future Path

Hi all my readers! Come back after a month of work. Such a productive month, maybe? Hmm, but I am jobless again now, I hate every each time I finished a project then I need to find another part time jobs again /.\

I got my STPM final result last wednesday, I don't have a very good result if I really want to compare with my friends, most of them got more than 3.5 which is pretty good. However, I am not ashamed with my result, at least I achieved my goal. If you try to judge me even I got this type of result and I am already satisfied, try to judge more, I won't stop you.

That's it, I got 3.08 after all of my semi hard work. I didn't retake any subjects even I got C+/C because I know my standard. I feel that even if I pay another RM50 to resit a paper, I will get the same result also. Maybe some of them will say, just try your luck, you could get better. You know what, I am lazy type of person, if you want me to study again what I had learned in the last sem, I probably.....

Speaking of my future path, the thing we should do now is applying local Universities. Since I don't have a very excellent result, so I don't expect myself to get into the best local U. I picked most of the courses in UUM, Kedah. We have 4 choices to pick the top 4 local U (UM, UPM, UKM & UTM) the nearest campus among all and another 8 choices to choose in the other states.

My parents keep on asking me what I really want to study, I never have the intention to tell them or share with them what I really want to study. I thought to study as event planner after SPM, but because of my family have some financial problem then I studied STPM, I didn't blame for what cause I worried if I find out event planner doesnt suit me, at least I won't waste the money.

And you know, some parents are those "i want you to be accountant, i want you to be whatwhat" and no doubt, I feel my parents are this type of person also. I mean, they didn't force me but they judge me. If i say i want to study mass comm, they probably will say "study banking la, finance la". I said I hate account, I don't want to study accounting, they will like "u don't want to study account then u take account for what" 

I was like, If I study account, does that mean I can only choose to be accountant? That's bullshit man. I don't know what kind of mindset they have, we study what, we must be doing what.

Until now, I still afraid to tell my parents what courses I chose. As I said, I hate account, obviously I won't choose accounting anymore, but I chose some managements, banking, communication courses. I'm not sure if I have chosen the right one, but at least I have a little interest on those courses.

Honestly, time doesn't matter if we really wish to continue to study. Like other people will think why take STPM since it takes 1.5 years to finish, wait 9 months to get into local U which wasted almost 1 year. (most importantly, they don't want to wear school uniform anymore) Look, no matter how old are you, you will still complete your studies in the end.

I don't know what my future will be, but I still wish that i could get the course I chose, please..

Have a nice day! :)

THOUGHT: STPM flash back

It's another month I have abandoned my blog and leave it like nothing, I have lost my blogging mood and not sure what to blog about. My graduation? My holidays? My STPM life? Till I viewed some bloggers' blog post inspired me to blog again. Should I just blog my STPM life?

Can say that I really didn't know what I have learned in this 1.5 years, I mean like STPM system changed to modular which we have 3 semesters and each semester for half year. Basically we can resit our papers if we feel that our results not so good in each semester, rm50 per subject, kinda cheap huh? Nice to hear when knowing you can resit even with bad results but nope. I bet you will just trouble yourself more, because resit papers happen right after sem 3 exam, then sem 1 then sem 2, which mean actually do not have much time to study all sem 1, 2 & 3 exam unless you know how to manage your time very well.

Just skip that part, I didn't resit any papers even thou my result wasn't that good, yea, "not that good". So I ended my exam much earlier than those who resit, and I enjoyed my holidays much earlier than those people. I rotted myself when weekday then part time job on weekend and everyday I am doing the same shit routine, wake up > breakfast > computer > tv > sleep > tv > sleep. What a life.

I shall just talk about form 6 life. Lets see what interesting stories I can share with you guys in my form 6 life, hmmm...

Oh, sort of interesting stories for me because I was chosen to be an assistant monitor! Just.. you know sometimes I do quite envy people who be monitor. They can sneak out with excuses "help teacher do smth, help teacher blabla", I have this thought when I was form 1 till form 5, in order to escape some annoying teachers' classes. I thought it was fun to be a monitor in form 6, but not, I wish I had more time to stay and focus in class. Also another reason I want to be monitor because I need koko marks to survive into local U.

Then, I met so many monsters among my classmates, not to mention who, lets bygone be bygone :p still thanks to those freaks who made my form 6 life quite fun and interesting also. Let me and my gfs have more topics to talk of, gossip always come to our minds during school time. Like no gossip no life, haha, and there's always a hot topic to talk, till now.

One of the best memories I had was we sang farewell song on the stage to my former MUET teacher - Ms Joice and thousand of audiences in the hall. Before I get to know her more, I heard people called her "big mama", indeed she was, with huge body size and big eyes, most of all, she was black. Thought she was a fun teacher at first, after a long period of class, she was a bored teacher, non stop telling us her stories and just any stories which kind of bored. She retired this year so my classmates & I made a decision, the entire class sang "you raise me up" (pretty funny that every years when teacher retires, students sing you raise me up only) and I made her a basket of fruits that looked kinda ugly.

And there's something brought me anger. One day, a bunch of students came to my class and asked me to hold their phones because they had their MUET speaking test. So I was being kind and helped them to keep. That day, I was having my super fierce yet good teacher class, my new MUET teacher. When halfway of our class, suddenly the phone rang, the teacher gone really pissed off and me & my classmates all get scolded by her, so I became the scapegoat until now I still haven't get my clean reputation back. You know what I hate the most, I was claimed the one who brought phone to school without switch off into silent mode and yet a bunch of idiots asked the X  not to apologize and no need to tell the truth to the teacher .

*I am not bearing a grudge against those incidents, I just hate being misunderstood*

Just can't think of any other anymore, but still thanks to everyone who brought me memories although I wasn't familiar with some of you or had some conflicts with you before.

THOUGHT: 那五年 The five years

Hola, just finished my trial and I finally have some time to blog, I am supposed to blog about kukup island and the activities with my fav gfs these days but.... hmm, some random thoughts strike into my mind and I wanted to blog about a person - my bf.

I believe everyone watched "被偷走的那五年". When I first saw the name, 五年, I was like five years, hmmm? Wondering what is the movie about. I watched it yesterday, sad love story movie, yea I cried because 张孝全 cried when his wife said sorry about what she did. You know that kind of feeling when a man cries for a woman.

I never really watch a love movie with him before, we have been together for 5 years, we normally watch action movies or some random movies but not kind of love movies. 

I barely talked about my bf after I have grown up or maybe after he entered his training school and I started my form 6 life. We meet once/twice a week or sometimes once in two weeks. I don't often stick with him like I was still in secondary school. Perhaps I had learned a lesson and I cherish my friends more. I'm not saying I don't love my bf anymore but what I actually thought, a couple doesn't have to meet everyday to prove they love each other even thou they have lessen their dating time.  

All these years since we both were form 2, people will thought I was or am the bad one who treat bf like a piece of shit, what I could admit is I have bad temper. I scold him once he makes me angry even if its only a simple mistake (normally happens before my period time). I wish I could change but nope, I couldn't so turned up he has to accept the fact of before my period I will non stop scolding him. 

I actually got no idea what to talk about in this post, but I am really impressed by his attitude and patience towards me. He isn't perfect, so do I. We both have weakness, everyone has. Trust & be faith is the key to hold a relationship, I can say.

Speaking of 张孝全 cried in the movie, I can feel the sadness inside. Whenever I argue with my bf, he will cries too, some people would say it's too weak for a man to cry, how can a man cries for a woman, not man at all, not cool at all. WRONG! Love is blind. A boy will do anything for his true love even its not man or cool at all. When I first saw he cried, or first heard he cried, my heart was so sore, so ache. A man will only cries for his gf when he really loves her. I'm not a love expert but sometimes I can understand the feelings he tried to express without a word. 

The purpose of this post isn't teaching how to love -.- this is only my random thought. No offense, no showing off. TQ for spending time on this post :) 

P/S: kukup island & some posts will be updated soon. Stay tuned.